Skip to content

Hosting a Memorial at Home 

As the saying goes, home is where the heart is. If hosting a memorial at home is the best venue for you and your attendees to feel closest to your loved one, then Lighten wants to help you plan it that way. 

Hosting a Memorial at Home Isn’t so Uncommon

The customs surrounding life celebrations are changing. And hosting a memorial outside the traditional funeral home environment is no longer out-of-the-norm. In fact, we understand that even the thought of setting foot in a funeral home can make some people cringe. If that applies to you, know that you are not alone in that experience. 

We want you and your family to feel comfortable in choosing a place that offers surroundings in which you can plan a unique and meaningful celebration of life. Whether you are beginning to plan ahead for yourself or are gathering ideas for your loved one’s service, consider these four potential elements to hosting a memorial at home.  

Food is the ingredient that binds us together

What foods would you or your family member want to be served at the memorial service? An old family recipe or a favorite holiday dish? Hosting a memorial at home is entirely conducive to celebrating with home-cooked foods. Ask family members to contribute dishes or order in from a favorite restaurant. It’s also not unusual to hear a loved one request that their friends and family enjoy a few drinks- maybe a bottle of their favorite whisky or scotch- at their memorial service. Being able to bring that bottle of something to be enjoyed on a back patio while the grill is going is an irreplaceably personalized experience. 

Life is a song. Love is the music. 

Would you want people to get up and dance at your memorial service? Music is a powerful conductor of memories, sentimentality, and togetherness. One of Lighten’s favorite, unique song choices was a request of the loved one before his passing, Roll Me Up and Smoke Me When I Die by Snoop Dog and Willie Nelson. Other choices we have seen families opt for are those songs tied to life milestones, such as a wedding song. We even hosted a memorial that included a disco dance party to reflect the deceased’s love of the DC and South Beach dance club scenes. The bottom line is: if you believe your loved one would want their life celebrated through dancing and cheer, make sure to clear a spot for the dance floor! 

The love of gardening is a seed once sown that never dies

~Gertrude Jenkins 

Audrey Hepburn once said, To plant a garden is to believe in tomorrow. Setting up a remembrance garden for your loved one, while gaining the participation of friends & family to help grow it, is a lovely way to honor your loved one. You can provide the seeds or buds of the departed’s favorite flowers and host a planting day at your home. Alternatively, request that friends and family bring the plant they would want to see grown in their loved one’s honor. Celebrating a life by giving their memory a new life adds a wonderful touch to hosting a memorial at home. 

Family Game Night Fun 

Do you have fond memories of many a family game night? Was there a large, around-the-table game played at every holiday gathering? There are just some things you can’t do at a restaurant reception and game night might be one of them. When hosting a memorial at home, get the card tables out and open the board game cupboard. Sometimes, there is no better way to honor your loved one’s memory than by buying Park Place for a steal. 

Lighten believes there can be joy and healing in the planning process of a memorial. Take as long as you need to decide on the elements that will contribute to a celebration that is completely unique to a person’s life. Maybe ask yourself, “What would make them smile?” and go from there. Whether that celebration ultimately takes place at home or somewhere else, Lighten can help.